half a decade later

it's been 5 years since i started writing here. at that time i was living in madison, wisconsin and spent my first thanksgiving alone, away from family. now i am living in philadelphia with a really amazing woman that i love a lot. yesterday we cooked all afternoon with her good friends who are visiting from out of town and appreciated being here and not in transit. i thought about plymouth and the national day of mourning, where i used to go each year. it was nice to speak to my family on the phone and i look forward to seeing them all in one month when i will have almost 2 weeks off of work. today i'm trying to refocus on the work that my full-time job as been distracting me from. there's a list goals for the month of november hanging on our fridge. just a few more days to get it all done!

breaking guitar strings and writing words again

shit. i'm not sure how i went the entire month of october without writing a single word here. i could simplisticly attribute it to this full-time job lifestyle, but there has to be more. i have to take responsibility too. writing is important; it's vital to my mental health. i don't think i can attribute my written silence to an unreliable internet connection either--at least not completely.

there was something about today. it felt like the beginning of a new era, a forging of that balance between self-confidence and self-critique. there was a heightened awareness of where i'm going and what i'm doing. this week, month, year, and beyond.

and now here i am, writing again. hello. it's nice to be back...